From the age of thirty to 36 I lived what felt like the greatest time of my life.
I had moved to California to pursue acting, then wiring army and teaching before coming full circle and choosing to be a chaplain again.
I took a job in Ogden utah. It felt like coming hone but still different. I dove into the job and relished the experience. But all things come to an end. When it ended it broke me because no job could ever come close to it.
That is the problem now. With a job I think about being the hospice chaplain and I feel I am dishonoring a sacred time if I engage. It isn’t even conscious. I just feel all weird and stay away from relationships and people and work
That goes back to intimacy and the woman I love. When I think about dating I get all twisted emotionally and end up feeling sad.
That keeps me just skimming on the surface of friendships, commitments and devotion.
mikemeyer949 