Kids

6:15am Having kids is the most difficult thing to experience.

The loss of freedom. Flexibility. Financial stability. So many things change when children enter the picture.

I was thinking on the walk how the first 13 years of being a parent feels surreal. I disassociated. There were two years I had a good job. I felt finically secure. there was balance at home and work. Otherwise I personally write off those years. I cherish the time with my daughter. But every other relationship was compromised. All other responsibilities were relegated. On many levels the individual me was in hibernation. Now as my daughter grows older I am re learning who I am. She is becoming a responsible young adult. The remainder of my life and the beginning of hers revolve around similar questions. “Who will I be?” “What will I accomplish?” “Where will I live?” “Who will I love?” As a parent it is scary beautiful to see her answering those questions for the first time. As a human being it is just as hopeful intimidating to be asking them for a second time.