Nouwen quoting Rogers

Nouwen quotes psychologist Carl Rogers on Pg 74 of The wounded Healer; “…that what is most personal and unique in each one of us is probably the very element which would, if it were shared or expressed, speak most deeply to others.” On Becoming a Person, Carl Rogers, p 26

Frustrated with team

5:47am after a good start to the week I had an anxiety attack yesterday afternoon. It wasn’t associated any event. I just went to work after lunch and was in a terrible mood. I don’t want to own negative energy. I am frustrated with the performance of my team. As a leader I need to improve their performance or replace them. I am not doing my job by allowing it to continue

Extreme Grouchy

2:08pm at the office. I got into an extremely grouchy mood all of the sudden. I locked myself in my office at work. I probably shouldn’t interact with people. I am in a bad mood

Contradiction of goals

7:27am in car, getting ready to drive to work. I say I want to achieve results but really I want peace of mind. I say I want to be known but I crave anonymity. Peace of mind and anonymity are dominant desires. I keep getting the same results. But I keep striving for being known and getting results.

Transcend

6:15am I am transcendent. I embody happiness and peace. Security, wealth, prosperity

Inner peace v results

1:21am Tuesday. Moment of clarity. The first part of my career was helping people achieve inner peace. My personal goal was inner peace. The last twelve years have been spent trying to achieve results. Specific results in the outside world.

Nouwen quote: leadership

“Nobody can offer leadership to anyone unless he makes his presence known- that is, unless he steps forward out of the anonymity and apathy of his milieu and makes the possibility of fellowship visible.” Nouwen, The Wounded Healer, pg 65

Work /Life balance

5:17am Monday. I am truly happy. I have balance in my life. I enjoy my free time. I work hard on days I work. I disengage and relax when I am not at work. I look forward to my future. I appreciate all I have. When I moved to Arizona everything was about work. I focused on my job. Now I can do well at work and enjoy life. I have found who I am as a worker. A parent. A husband. A son.

Figure out Sunday

4:32pm I have figured out Sunday. Which is huge. The secret is not to think about work at all. To not think ahead even a second. To just be in the moment. I have a future I look forward to. I am here. Now. I am happy.

Success puzzle

2:02pm at a new rest stop, just past the Arizona state line. Sunday Father’s Day. This is the latest I have had a first post in a long time. Success is like a puzzle. Since 2009 I have been trying. I keep doing the same thing and getting the same results. I have traded out the puzzle- sales, operations, entrepreneurship. But I stack the pieces the same. I try hard. I give a good effort. But I don’t ignite. Take off. Find security. Growth. Change language: I approach opportunities in innovative ways. I find success. I grow. I expand. I flow.