Will I ever be social again?

10:34am, in my office, Phoenix, Arizona, Friday morning, December 10, 2021. I spend the vast majority of my time sitting silently alone, watching entertainment content on electronic devices, usually while eating food and/or drinking alcohol. We are talking tens of thousands of good youthful energetic hours wasted passively consuming the activities and relationships of others, while I do next to nothing. What is wrong with me? Why don’t I go out and live my life? It is not a stretch to say I am addicted to this behavior. I crave it, I fantasize about it and I plan my life around it. Is voyeurism really so much more appealing than actually being with people? Do I not know how to enjoy the company of others? Will I ever be social again?

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