Emotional “kinks”

7:12pm, pacific standard time, hotel in Palm Desert, California, USA, Wednesday night, April 19, 2023. Another anxious morning, albeit slightly less severe. Why does everyday start with the same ritual? I spend hours preparing for 9 hours of work, just so I can finally relax, come back to the hotel, eat dinner, watch television and fall asleep. I am not sad, frustrated or depressed in the morning. I can’t even say worried. Rather, my emotions are out of alignment, similar to being physically out of whack from a night spent sleeping wrong. And just like those occasions when I have to work out kinks in my muscles or joints, I have to spend time working out emotional “kinks” when I wake up from a restless night. I just wish it didn’t have to happen every single day. It is starting to get a little exhausting.