May 21, 2023, Sunday evening, 6:23pm, pacific standard time, apartment in Dana Point, California, USA. A good day. Usual Sunday anxiety, but enjoyable overall. I slept in past 8am, which is something I rarely do. Didn’t go for a walk or workout. Picked my daughter up at 10am and grabbed breakfast. Went and got a haircut at noon. Drank coffee at the coffee shop for a little while afterwards. Took a nap, went shopping, then dropped my daughter off at the softball fields so she could work the concession stand with her friend. Now I am doing laundry. On another note; my daughter’s mom found a check from a recently closed bank account. I had been looking for that check for months. Odd that I closed the account, but the bank sent the check to her solely in her name. I told her to keep the money. I am just happy the mystery is solved.

May 30, 2023, Saturday night, 9:03pm, apartment in Dana Point, California, USA. Walked this morning, grabbed coffee, worked out. Later, I picked up breakfast for my daughter. When I got to Aliso Viejo she wanted to drive around and listen to music so we ran errands. In the afternoon we went out to get dinner at her favorite burger place. Later, her mom came home from spending time with friends. I fed the dog then came back to Dana Point at 8:15pm. The sky was misty and overcast today. Yet, the air was warm with a puffing cool breeze. The kind of weather you only get in Southern California.

May 19, 2023, Friday morning, 11:03, office in Palm Desert, California, USA. Internal stress is the same as physical stress. There comes a point where exerting effort is counter productive. If I am working out and my muscles are fatigued there is no benefit continuing. The only remedy to heal is rest. The only way to get stronger is to take a break. I need to take time off from work to recuperate. I have been going too hard and too long without rest and it is no longer beneficial. We will see if I take that advice. I have a tendency to see the solution long before I act on it.

May 18, 2023, Thursday evening, 6:27pm, hotel in Palm Desert, California, USA. They extended an offer today to a Director candidate. He accepted. Thank god. I burned out on this place a long time ago. Not everything was bad. I have good memories and am proud of what we accomplished. It’s just that I expended so much energy turning this site around I ran out of energy. Now it is time to hand it off and let someone else run it. I feel relieved.

May 17, 2023, Wednesday afternoon, 4:27pm, office in Palm Desert, California,USA. Had a second interview for the area director position today. I was apprehensive to take on more responsibility at first. Now I am excited. The key to success will be hiring and retaining qualified directors. That is a skill I possess. The job would also offer more flexibility of schedule. Technically, I would be working from home and traveling 75% of the time. Right now I travel 100%. It would be nice to be home a little more, at least a couple times a month.

May 16, 2023, Tuesday morning, 6:39am, hotel in Palm Desert, California,USA. I remember back to working Tuesdays as a chaplain. They were typically good days. After a busy Monday catching up from the weekend things would settle down on Tuesday. I could set my schedule for the week and have plenty of free time built in. With this job Tuesdays are the worst. It is the first day back in the office and issues have been piling up since the weekend. My to do list is already long before I walk in the door. I find it interesting how every job has certain good days and bad days. Depending on the situation, what once was cherished can quickly become tedious.

May, 15, 2023, Monday night, 7:11pm, hotel in Palm Desert, California,USA. Have my second interview for the promotion on Wednesday. It is with the regional Vice President who I will report to. She is the one who opened the position specifically for me, so it isn’t too stressful. Today, I walked the dog, worked out, did my meetings, then drove to Palm Desert. While drinking coffee this morning I read about a terrible accident on the freeway I travel. Made me drive extra cautiously. Now I am at the hotel winding down for the night.

May 14, 2023, Sunday evening, 6:36pm, Mother’s Day, apartment in Dana Point, California, USA. Walk and workout this morning. Grabbed coffee in monarch beach, then got some more later in Dana point at the local coffee shop. Had Mother’s Day celebration in Aliso Viejo. Took the dog for a walk late morning. It was too hot. We were both spent and tired afterwards. I took a brief nap, put together patio furniture for my daughter’s mom, then took the girls to the mall. Finally we grabbed dinner and ate at at the dining room table. We we finished I headed back to the apartment for laundry.

May 13, 2023, Saturday morning, 11:41am, apartment in Dana Point, California, USA. I learned an interesting stress relief technique yesterday. When I feel overwhelmed I can recall something the causes me grief. Like remembering Arizona, my dad, my brother, Utah, the WIL, my first dog, etc. Losses that still have a strong spiritual half-life in my soul. If I do it right and let the feelings flow through me I instantly tear up, sob, and frown. The moment lasts only a second or two but, it is enough to break the grip of anxiety that manifests constantly in my throat. The trick is to not “think” about the person, place or thing I am grieving. If I start consciously thinking it doesn’t help. In fact, it causes more consternation. Rather, I need to allow the base surface emotional moment to hit, cause the grief reaction, then wash away the ugly tension inside me. I have only used this technique for a little while, time will tell if it truly works. Hopefully, it is a solution with staying power, I am getting tired of feeling overwhelmed.

May 11, 2023, Thursday evening, 7:10pm, pacific standard time, hotel in Bakersfield, California, USA. Just work the last two days. The usual feelings of stress from dozens of little things that eventually resolve and then are replaced by a dozen more. I worked out this morning, then went to the office early. Being over two branches and having to prepare morning calls takes too much time. I snuck off for a quick nap today before afternoon meetings that lasted until 5pm. Then I came back to the hotel for dinner and bed. I did call my mom tonight and heard the latest news from Wyoming.