Category: Happy

A year

6:12am the first part of a year is harder. There are no big holidays. Planned breaks. It is six months of slogging through relative weeks. The second half is the year is better. Summer is in full motion. It starts with a good holiday.there is Labor Day, the cool air of fall, the build up to Halloween. After Halloween it is a short time until thanksgiving. Then it is coasting until Christmas and New Years. Making it through the first half of the year feels like a victory.

At the pool

4:03pm brought the girls to the swimming pool at the complex. It is hot. I am sitting in the shade and sweating. We have been here an hour. They were getting a little crazy in the apartment. Good for them to work off energy. Good for me to get out of the house. Even sitting here feeling anxious is better than sitting in the apartment cycling over nothing.

Future

9:10am I am excited for the future. I never got to be happy as a father. Before my daughter was born I began grieving the loss of the chaplain, time with the WIL. When my daughter was a year old our marriage was wounded. All my happy memories were before my daughter was born. We haven’t had the “good” time of her life yet. There are good memories but not an overall good time. My wife and I have struggled. This morning I found hope. Hope that the time off happiness as a parent is in the offing. Just as the time of happiness before I was a parent eventually came as the chaplain in utah. I am ready to embrace happiness. Love. Family.