October 15, 2024, Tuesday night, (Wednesday morning) 12:48am, pacific standard time, apartment in Dana Point, California, USA. I need to upgrade my computer. The one I am using is over 14 years old. It can’t perform basic functions and operates slowly or not at all. I also need to upgrade my resume and start taking this search seriously. Though I have time because of the separation agreement it is going to go quick. 2025 will be here in no time. I did apply for a Regional Vice President job today but with computer issues and a sloppy resume I am don’t have much hope.

October 14, 2024, Monday night, 7:52m, pacific standard time, apartment in Dana Point, California, USA. Applied for a job in Costa Mesa this morning. Also reached out to work and reminded them I have a car they need to pick up. This afternoon I worked out at planet fitness, got my daughter Little Caesar’ crazy bread for dinner and bought her lunch items from Ralph’s up by their house.

October 12, 13, 2024, Saturday,Sunday morning 6:10am, pacific standard time, apartment in Dana Point, California, USA. The meeting for AHA endorsement on Friday went well. The Board member was impressed by my experience and Clinical Pastoral Education. She even mentioned suggesting me as a potential Board candidate in 2025. After that I spent most of the day waiting to pick up my daughter from school. Her and I had a little spat Friday evening. She wasn’t feeling well and had plans Saturday yet she still wanted her boyfriend to visit. When I said “No” she complained. It was frustrating for both of us but in the end We were able to patch things up. She went to her convention yesterday and had a good time. My friend from Arizona is leaving this morning. We didn’t get to spend much time together but they is alright.

October 10, 11, Thursday, Friday, 8:42am, pacific standard time, parking lot of offices off oak canyon, Irvine, California, USA. Yesterday drove back from La Mirada, spent time with the dog and reviewed the Humanist Manifesto III. At 4pm I picked my daughter up from school, took her to Cane’s, then picked up her boyfriend, dropped them off, picked them up later, took him home and then took her home before going to my house. I have a friend visiting for a couple days. Mt apartment is not conducive to multiple people so I am doing my endorsement phone call in the car. One thing to note about my job search: I am approaching it looking for reprieve from pressure. That will never work. I have to go all in and be willing to risk or I might as well be dead.

October 9, 2024, Wednesday (written Thursday morning, 6:48am, pacific standard time), residence inn, room 221, La Mirada, California,USA, came north to visit a friend last night and used points for a hotel stay rather than driving back to Dana Point. I am glad I did it. It was nice not to have to drive back late. It was also nice to get outbid the house and not be alone another night. My life is so subdued right now. I have no routine and my phone barely rings. I used to get calls, texts, emails and notifications 24 hours a day. Now there is silence. I don’t miss my old life but I would like more structure.

October 8, 2024, Tuesday afternoon, 4:41pm, pacific standard time, parking lot Monarch Bay Plaza, Dana Point, California, USA. Drove to city of Orange today and renewed my BLS certification. Afterwards, I came home and updated my Chaplain resume. Originally I envisioned working PRN for a small hospice company. I am rethinking my strategy. I have gone so far professionally in hospice. It is hard to shift gears so drastically and still leave the door open for a return to Executive Leadership. Perhaps I am better off looking at Chaplain work in a different healthcare setting, one that would give me a chance to start fresh while leaving the door open for future opportunities.

October 6,7, 2024, Sunday, Monday morning 9:24am, pacific standard time, apartment in Dana Point, California, USA. Yesterday was a good day. Walked and worked out, took my daughter to get a bagel, washed the work car (I still have it and the gas card still works) then came home and sipped whiskey while watching football and listening to the dodgers/Padres game. This morning I felt better than I probably deserved. I will remember that when I complain about a hangover from a couple drinks. I am not sure what to do today. I got the link to complete my chaplain endorsement. I looked for jobs online and there is a potential one that looks like a decent fit. I could also blow everything off and just go for a long drive. This will be the last week of freedom before I have to buckle down and get serious. Whatever I choose I am excited to see what the future holds. want to do something different and rise to the best of my abilities.

October 5, 2024, Saturday evening, 5:58pm, pacific standard time, apartment in Aliso Viejo, California, USA. Spent the day with my daughter. Her mom went to Valencia to visit family. Now I am sitting on the couch with the dog, watching Dark Winds on Netflix. I am giving serious consideration to applying for marketing jobs. They are plentiful and quick to hire. They are also difficult and quick to fire. But a marketing job would be easier to get than a Chaplain job and produce more income. I don’t want to be out of work three months and incur debt. Best to be proactive and stay busy.

October 4, 2034, Friday night, 10:24pm, pacific standard time, apartment in Dana Point, California, USA. I choose to be optimistic and see the current situation as an opportunity for growth. I can find a new job with better pay, benefits and stability. I can upgrade my car and living conditions. The fact is I have been thrust into a new reality through no fault of my own. It is a high risk endeavor with three possible outcomes; grow, replace or step back. 2025 is going to be more interesting than anticipated. I tried to work on my chaplain stuff today but the link for my endorsement application expired. I reached out to get it reset but haven’t heard back.

October 3, 2024, Thursday afternoon, 3:52pm, pacific standard time, parking lot of office building off Town Center Drive in Laguna Niguel, California,USA. I came back to town around 10am this morning. My daughter stayed home from school and wanted breakfast so I grabbed something and drove up to see her. After that I worked a little on a project from the past and spent time with a friend visiting from Beaumont . While I am off work I am leaning into being the chaplain again and writing. Not sure where it will take me but at this point in my life I better do what I can while I can. The project I am working on is called Death Bed Religion; A spiritual treatise on what really matters when the chips are down. I have had various versions of it for well over ten years. If nothing else comes from this time I will have at least created something to be proud of.