Tag: issues

Work again

12:10pm in my office. Writing another post about work. Of course. The meeting at the coffee shop went alright. I appreciate the nurse sharing her perceptions. I made some changes in the reporting structure to mitigate the issues. The changes will be beneficial but they will hurt the pride of some other employees. I did what had to be done. I need to control the situation. I have felt a sense of peace since I looked for jobs this morning. In a way it made this job feel brand new. Which revitalized me. Four hours later I am drained. But it was nice to have reprieve. I have felt peace a couple of times in the last two days. I don’t get to feel that tension release often.

Perspective

7:53am I am able to find perspective. That reduces my anxiety. I can step outside my situation, be objective. Work has issues. One of the issues is low referral volume. I am fixing it. Instead of spiraling to despair I stay level. I address the issue. I have other ones to work on. I will address them like I do everything else. That is what I am paid to do. I had a dream last night. I was taking blame for issues at work. Then someone mentioned a professional basketball player and his problems in the playoffs. I said I would take blame for that. I caught myself in my dream. It was so absurd I realized I was just piling on problems whether I created them or not. This site had issues before I got here. I am committed to working on them, improving and growing.

Trying to have it all

5:57am the first time I felt panic was in 2006. I overextended myself at work and started my MBA. I had too much going on. I tried to find peace by resolving every issue that caused stress. I failed. There was always something to solve. I couldn’t relax. I feel the same now. I keep try to find a way to make everything alright. There is never going to be that moment. This is as close as I will get. Today I will not try and solve everything. I will just be present.