7:08am, my apartment in Chandler, Arizona, Saturday morning, December 18, 2021. The road curved and flattened before undulating down. Was this the right path? Had I missed a turn? It seemed familiar, yet so much time had passed I couldn’t be sure. Then instantly, as if right on cue, the meadow opened before me. Sunlight washed over tall yellow flowers, the jagged mountains rose to meet the clouds and there, off in the distance, was the tiny house we called home. Bitter pain of wrenching loss, ridiculous hope for an impossible reunion and the always tortuous memories surrounded me. And in that moment I could not help but ask the question I knew would never be answered, “How did something so beautiful ever end?”
Tag: loss
Loss
9:33am Monday morning, Arizona, in the office. The WIL’s aunt passed away over the weekend. Her obituary was in the local Utah paper. I want to say something, tell her I am sorry, but I won’t. It isn’t my place to disrupt the separation she seems to want. It has been two years since we saw each other, over a year and a half since we spoke. I thought time would make things easier, but that isn’t the case at all. The loss feels more severe every moment I realize she is gone forever. I shouldn’t complain. Others are worse off. We all deal with loss; loss of health, loved ones, eventually our very lives. But today hurts more than usual.
Highlights negative
12:56pm the worst thing about the ending of the relationship with the WIL is how it highlights the negative. There was so much happiness and beauty. For years she filled me with absolute joy. the highest highs of my life are memories of her. Not even close. But now all I can feel is sadness. Remember the pulling away. The silence. I know the beauty still existed. But the painful loss has overcome my ability to recall it easily
mikemeyer949 