Re Firing Energy

Giving up, giving in, accepting an outcome other than my objective is infuriatingly seductive.

The slightest tinge of resistance sends me into deep stagnation.

I fritter the day away with pity filled vignettes where I cast myself a wronged but valiant warrior.

Logically I can see the futility of this behavior but the emotions are unbelievably powerful.

The only way to save myself in that instance is to forcibly will myself to do at least one tiny minuscule simple task toward my objective in hopes of re firing my energy in the proper direction.

The battle to do even that is monumental and exhausting. I am ashamed to admit oftentimes I fail.

Conditioned for Specific Results

A sports team has one objective, to win a championship. Failure to do so immediately or quickly usually results in dismissal of personnel. Every once in a while subjective metrics or barriers perceived out of the norm will buy time but the quest for a championship is a zero sum business. Achieve the objective or be replaced.
The same is true for most sales people, corporate officers or any business in general. The specific objective of sales, revenue and profit must be achieved or you will be dismissed and replaced.
In order to achieve the results you wish your mind must be conditioned to not only exist but thrive in a high pressure situation that demands specific results.