7:28am, apartment in Dana Point, California, Sunday morning, February 13, 2022. Adverse symptoms from the cold I caught two weeks ago are still present, which is frustrating. Having a stuffy nose and persistent headache makes enjoying activities difficult. I can take cold medicine but too much of it makes me tired and slows me down. This morning the dog and I did our usual walk followed by a trip to the store to buy Valentine’s Day treats for everyone. I will leave for Arizona around ten and get in by 5:30pm. This week is busy at work with payroll tomorrow morning followed by a 3 day mock survey. Thursday night I am leaving work early to come back to Dana Point. The following week I fly in Wednesday morning for an interview with the Southern California hospice company. Unless something drastic changes my mind I will take that job and move back to Orange County around the end of March, beginning of April.
Tag: Orange County
Palm desert stop
7:42am Pacific time, Palm Desert, California, Saturday morning, February 12, 2022. Almost to Orange County, stopped to rest and get something to eat. Left Arizona at 5am mountain time and drove straight through. I made one quick stop outside Blythe but I will take more time in Palm Desert. My daughter had a friend stay over last night. They are usually pretty messy and loud in the morning so I am not in a particular hurry.
Sometimes life blows
6:35pm, apartment, Chandler, Arizona, Thursday night, February 10, 2022. Two senior leaders from Southern California called this afternoon. They wanted to discuss a position similar to what I am doing now. That annoyed me. The recruiter I had been talking with said the call was for a regional role. I can’t tell if she lied or was misled herself. Either way, I felt a little deceived and a lot let down. But the call wasn’t all bad, the job has some strong selling points: the pay is pretty high for the position, there is more responsibility and most importantly, I can move back to Orange County. That gives me mixed emotions: as a father I am filled with joy. I can go home and be close to my daughter. However, career wise, taking the job would be suicide. Companies like this churn middle management every day, especially in Orange County. I keep asking myself what should I do? Go back for a job destined to fail or stay in Phoenix and miss my daughters teen years? Either decision leaves something to be desired. It’s as if no matter what I choose a great big sucking heartbreaking hole opens in the middle of my chest, leaving me with no possibility of happiness. Sometimes life blows.
Not with this outfit
6:20pm, apartment, Chandler, Arizona, Tuesday night, February 8, 2022. Had a call set up with the COO a Southern California company at four today but it was rescheduled at the last minute. We both were too busy. The recruiter thought it might cause problems but I don’t want to work for someone thats not flexible. Besides, he already rescheduled twice. The possibility of relocating back to Orange County is still available, but optimism is not high at the moment. At least not with this outfit.
Saturday updates
4:25pm, apartment, Chandler, Arizona, Saturday afternoon, February 5, 2022. Updates from earlier in this week: The second covid test was negative, which was a relief. After the urgent care visit and trip to the pharmacy I have some prescriptions. Steroids and cough suppressant have helped, but haven’t conquered the feeling of being run down. Travel to Orange County did not happen this weekend. Work was frustrating and the recruitment call resulted in a phone interview this coming Tuesday for a regional job in Southern California.
A Saturday Afternoon in Orange County
1:21pm (PST), wife and daughter’s apartment, lying in bed, Dana Point, CA, Saturday afternoon, January 8, 2022. I arrived at 11am after leaving Chandler at approximately 5am (MST). When I arrived we sat at the table and ate leftovers for lunch before doing school work. Now I am napping while my daughter plays an online game. The wife is in the living room and the dog is lying next to me.
Friday, January 7, 2022
2:19pm, in my office, Phoenix, Arizona, Friday afternoon, January 7, 2022. Monday is the beginning of our big integration at work. All of our back office and clinical functions will change. It is going to be intense; for three weeks we are going to migrate records, move systems and learn new software. I am ready to get started because it has been stressful preparing. I feel run down and we haven’t even started yet!
Memories from a year ago
6:17am, apartment in Chandler, Arizona, Monday morning, January 3, 2022. A year ago (Monday January 4th) I walked into work and was greeted at the door by the HR director. She informed me I had been laid off; No warning, no advance knowledge, not even a hint. I was the Executive Director in charge while the CEO took an extended sabbatical. When he got back I was no longer needed. For three months I navigated the site through an office move, staffing issues, billing concerns, clinical leadership changes and the pandemic resurgence. Then I was let go. Finically I was in a terrible position, I couldn’t afford rent and had no job prospects in Orange County. I expanded my search area and that is how I ended up in Arizona. Despite the start to the year I look back on 2021 as mostly good. I am proud of how the year turned out. I miss being close to my daughter but the change in perspective did me good. Now I want to take this adventure, wrap it up, hold onto the memories and get back to my life in Orange County.
Sunday Afternoon, January 2, 2022
3:33pm, apartment in Chandler, Arizona, Sunday afternoon, January 2, 2022. I woke up late this morning, which meant not going for a walk or working out because I had to drive to the office and enter payroll before 10am. I finished early and was out of there before 9. Other than that I haven’t been productive today at all. The family left yesterday at 2pm. We went shopping and grabbed lunch before they got on the road. They arrived in Orange County at 8pm pacific time which meant I was already asleep by the time my daughter texted to let me know. I took down the apartment’s Christmas decorations last evening. Perhaps that was a mistake. Now the place looks as empty as it feels. The post-holiday let down coupled with everyone leaving is depressing. Vacation is over, spending time with my family has past and I am feeling very alone right now.
New Years Day
9:16am, apartment in Chandler, Arizona, Saturday, January 01, 2022, New Years Day. My family goes back to Orange County today. They planned on leaving at nine but are still asleep. I don’t blame them, we are all tired from staying up late last night. The dog and I went for a walk at six, then drove down the block to fill the car with gas before having coffee and breakfast. I feel weird right now; emotionally indifferent, with no ambition. What do I look forward to this coming year? There is no overarching plan, and that makes me nervous.
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