1:55pm, in my office, Phoenix, Arizona, Wednesday afternoon, December 15, 2021. It is natural, when things slow down, to think about being someplace else. After all, life is more enjoyable in reflection, when current circumstances cease to demand attention. This afternoon I left my office, drove to a nearby park and sat in my car. As the bright sun warmed me, my mind wandered to last year. I recalled being in Dana Point, sitting on my couch, experiencing a similar moment. It was not a perfect time. The ongoing pandemic resurged and large group restrictions were in place. My wife and daughter had moved out and my mother, recuperating from a nasty fall, had moved in. I was settling into a new job that, unbeknown to me, was going to end in three weeks. It was not a time l felt particularly content, yet sitting in my car, remembering it, all I felt was peace. Now I am looking at decisions I will make for the coming year; Will I stay in Arizona? Or maybe move back to Orange County? Perhaps even end up somewhere I have yet to discover? Many times in life I find myself missing what was left in the past and that makes me realize something; come next year, when I have a moment to reflect, I very well could be enjoying the sunshine of a similar afternoon, in a new someplace else, missing the very place I am now.
Tag: sun
Drive
10:15am The drive to California irritated me. I couldn’t relax. Heavy dust blew across the road, causing trucks to swerve in the narrow lanes. The sun heated the windshield and stifled the air. My phone buzzed with the constant ding of new messages. I worried for my safety and wondered what work I was missing. I longed to be somewhere safe and quiet. Away from the noise, the motion and the incessant calling. I regretted setting an appointment for today. I had set aside this time to be free. Now I cornered myself into obligation. The realization made the miles go even slower.