7:25am Sunday morning. On my walk I felt anxious. The reason I felt that way is because I have had so many opportunities to succeed; jobs, businesses, writing. Yet I have not found sustainable results. The question I ask is; am I a failure? I suppose it depends on what I mean by “success.” If I am measuring it by possessions and numbers in my bank account then the answer is “yes.”But beyond those measures do I really feel I failed? Perhaps I have unrealistic expectations. The road to success is not easy, nor constant. I lived life the way I wanted to live it. Honoring the goals I deemed important. Sure, not everything has gone smooth, I have had challenges. But I am not going to change, I can’t change. I don’t want to change. This is who I am and who I will be until the bitter end. (That made me think of a song) “if you need a shoulder, or if you need a friend. I’ll be here standing, until the bitter end..” Rocket Queen by Guns and Roses-/. What I am saying is I like who I am. Some results suck. Like changing jobs every year,being away from my daughter, being in debt, not communicating with the WIL. But those are consequences of life lived. I am still moving forward. I will reach for new goals while trying to get back to those I love, connect with those I lost and honoring commitments I already made.