Do you lie to yourself?
Do you feel like you have a plan? That you know what you need to do to be successful?
Yet you struggle to make your house payment, have credit card debt, no savings or retirement and work a job that makes you miserable for a boss you don’t like?
Stop lying to yourself. No plan includes those things. You don’t know what to do.
Now is the time to fix it.
Successful people are born with opportunity instinct or a combination of both.
The rest of us must find it or learn it.
Stop sitting around feeling bitter. Get off your ass and change your life.
I am kind of having a crisis of identity. I notice I write these posts on Monday mornings. I am working sales but I hate going to sales meetings with nothing to show for it. On trial and failure. I guess everyone would do it if it were easy?
I feel anxiety gripping my throat. I can’t breathe. I can’t move forward and get a ‘win.’ I can’t let go and accept defeat. I put myself in this situation thinking it was sink or swim. Who knew there was a third option. Just get ground down. I hate doing sales when there are no sales.
How do some people achieve amazing results while others stay stuck? They use techniques instinctively. If you weren’t lucky to be born with those skills innately it is up to you to learn them if you want to be successful. It is a more difficult process but you have to play the hand dealt you.
I am sitting here writing and I can see how I get pulled away. It is the squares. I come up with a good idea, I right it down and then I want to flit away and not keep pressing and moving forward. I want to just bask in the emotional high that I came up with something decent then spend the rest of the day building dreams in my head about how I am going to write a million dollar book and speak to enthralled audiences.
In 2019 Jason Shelley was the heir apparent at quarterback for the university of utah football team. He was going to be the starter of a nationally ranked team. People are excited about his abilities and what he can do. Presumably Jason Shelley dreamed of winning games scoring touchdowns and the roar of the crowds adulation.
They brought in Cam Rising. Though he hasn’t played a snap people are more excited by his potential. He has the buzz. Then before practice even begins utah lands a graduate transfer jake Bentley to play quarterback.
This is where the squares and patterns become prominent. What was the original objective of Jason Shelley. To lead the team to touchdowns win football games, make the playoff and win a championship. The circles didn’t change.
But the squares and patterns changed. Does coach doubt me? What made him doubt me? Do they see something I don’t? What did I do wrong? What does he hate me? This is my job, he said so last year. I haven’t had a chance to practice as much. They aren’t even looking at my film.
That is the static, all the emotional and narrative energy that flows through our minds.
Imagine what rickie Fowler had to block out. He was just voted over rated. He probably wanted to stick it to his peers. He was dreaming of the cameras flashing hugging his loved ones, putting the trophy on his mantle. But you see his focus. His mind didn’t wander from the objective. To the good the bad, the confusing, scary or frustrating.
Emotions and feelings are infinitely powerful and they can pull you off your objective like a gust of wind on a high rope.
Make your goals immediate. I am going to achieve my objective today. Not some for a quarter or a week or month
I go into this weird state where I have energy, time to do stuff but I get all pissy and anxious and end up just stewing. Sometimes I don’t have any energy and other times I can’t properly direct it. How do I get it flowing and growing?
My introverted self only takes relationships to a superficial level. In order to achieve my objective I need to develop more interpersonal skills. I had a great lunch really connected. But on a personal level that is all I usually do. I don’t have close friends I talk with regularly or build close relationships. I am good at going to the lunch, small talk, making plans but not following through. Hence why I am not consistent and I don’t sustain growth
The ego will roar to be fed. Achieving the objective seldom happens on the first effort. Failure leads to assessment of what went wrong. We don’t know what went wrong so we take the “facts” of what happened and determine an alternate course. Maybe the first two or three times we remain confident.
Then it happens again and again. The objective isn’t achieved. We start to doubt ability.
We can give up and not try but it is still new so we don’t do that. But we look for patterns. We see shortcomings and others don’t fix. Blame them. Blame situation. And since they have been identified we are hyper aware of them. We see failure, we see the perceived reason. We associate them.
The situation runs out, we give up or we are removed.
I worked sales on business consulting. Completed training, did ride along, practiced my pitch. I was raring to go. They sent me five leads. I failed. They sent me five more. Nothing. Four. Four. Five. It my last one had a good talk. Got farther than I ever had. I felt I was figuring it out.
Come Monday I didn’t get any leads. They said sorry. Next day sent me two. I didn’t make a sale. No leads. No leads. Complained. 2 leads. Nothing. Next Monday nothing. Tuesday nothing. Wednesday I get an email I won’t get any more leads. I didn’t produce.
I had a week where they really fed me.
Then just a couple more. Why waste the leads?
So you know what I did? I started cold calling to make my own leads.
