7:56pm, pacific standard time, apartment in Dana Point, California, USA, Saturday, June 18, 2022. Had a good early Father’s Day celebration; went out for sushi dinner, then shopping for a new cologne, followed by chocolates from the sweet shop. Now we are sitting on the couch watching anime and enjoying the sunset.

8:53am my energy has shifted. I have shed “sales” mindset. The desperate frustration. I am an expert in hospice. I solve issues, help people

There is so much beauty in what I was, what I am, what I could be. The joy overflows and becomes anxiety, disappointment, depression. I stop the energy from overflowing and becoming negative

6:12am my anxiety comes from overthinking. Wanting to hold the past, conquer the future, win every challenge. I take my energy down. I don’t think about everything all at once. I am at peace.

8:05pm a lot of thoughts in my head. Concentrate on letting go. Blank space. Release. Relief

9:47am I had a dream about the WIL last night. I am haunted by memories. The losses in life can be devastating.

“Don’t say it’s over, cause that’s the worse news I could here..” Avett Brothers, if its the beaches

“No authority, no institution, no outer concrete reality has the power to relieve them of their anxiety and loneliness and make them free.” The Wounded Healer, pg 28

Life is just shuffling a deck of cards. No matter the material changes the fundamental structure remains the same.

2:27pm at work. I have had such a shitty last ten years. I don’t know how to stay at a job. How to be loyal. How to accept loyalty

9:18am made it to work today. Slept in this morning. Feeling nostalgic. First day of summer vacation for my daughter. She is in sailing camp.

5:03pm Sunday’s are easier when I don’t try to solve Monday. I can’t avoid the pain of transition. why try?